Bloodstock, Catton Hall

Day one

Even for the festival veteran Bloodstock is an eye opening experience and a constant source of confusion and fascination. You think you’ve seen it all and then suddenly a vampire and a troop of Vikings strolls by or an Imperial Stormtrooper stops you and requests to see your identification. This isn’t a festival that dares to be different it positively embraces individuality and squeezes it so hard it’s eyes bulge and it’s cheeks go a breathtaking shade of pink.

We arrive late on the Friday and by all accounts a lot of the fun has been happening without us. Fortunately we do make it just in time to see the mighty and much missed Carcass take the stage. I’ve waited about 15 years to see this band and felt like a teenager again seeing the video for Heartwork on Headbangers Ball for the very first time. Opening with Inpropagation the crowd lap it up. The double bass kicks in and the fellow next to me launches into a marathon headbang that continues for the rest of the set. Like a knife to the jugular the band tear through the set like steel through flesh. The blistering set was only marred by a couple of sound issues and the annoying fireworks that were set off during Ken Owens drum solo. Ending in the only way they could with the huge twin guitar attack of Heartwork, its time to cross off one of my bands to see before dying and go get merry.

Day Two

Saturday begins with beautiful sunshine, although through this hangover the sunshine doesn’t seem quite so beautiful. The style of the day requires denim, leather or… chainmail? We went to sleep in a metal festival to the distant strains of heavy metal karaoke on the Sophie Lancaster Stage. It seems we woke up in the Middle Ages! This definitely isn’t your average everyday run of the mill festival.

Off to the main stage for a little music starting with The Haunted throw down with some heavy riffs and good beats. Next up, a blast from the past, Entombed take to the stage. The years disappear and Entombed deliver a great set with the vigour of men half their age.

Candlemass have a tough act to follow. Despite getting the crowds fists pumping, unfortunately some of the atmosphere that their music evokes is lost in the daylight. Like Vikings storming a village to plunder and pillage, the Norsemen of Enslaved take to the stage grabbing the crowds attention with some prog-black metal. Playing mostly from albums Ruun and Isa, frontman, Grutle, weilds his bass like an axe unleashing hell on to the happy crowd.

Saturday is in full swing when Apocalyptica take to the stage and they turn things up an extra notch. The Metallica covers that made them famous are there but Apocalyptica stand in their own right as a great live metal act and today we see why. Next up it’s Blind Guardian and their huge sound goes down well with the Bloodstock crowd. Double bass drums and heavy guitars are just what the Bloodstock doctor ordered. Cradle Of Filth are last up on the main stage but their set is cut short after a projectile thrown from the crowd struck guitarist Paul Allender who stumbled backwards into the backdrop while the rest of the band slowly realise there is something seriously wrong. Mr Allender was whisked off to hospital and the act was condemned by all quarters.

The end of the live music does not signal an end to the festivities at Bloodstock and the party goes on well into the night. Karaoke returns to the Sophie Lancaster Stage and the fairground provides constant amusement. But it’s the discovery of a new game called “Forky” that is the most intriguing. Throw a fork in the air and get excited at how it lands? Like I said, this isn’t your usual festival. We ponder the intricacies of the game at the bar.

Day Three

It’s the dawn of another heavy metal day at Bloodstock! The Sunday morning hangover is the worst time to discover a whole new level of nasty, just when you thought festival toilets couldn’t get any worse. Once the trauma of the morning is done it’s into the arena for the final day of the Bloodstock festival.

The dulcet tones of Girlschool ring out across the main arena, a healthy dose of classic rock in the summer sunshine. All of a sudden we’re at the Monster Energy Drink bar and there’s a giant steel ball filled with motorbikes. They’re riding horizontal, they’re riding upside down and all manner of craziness. Bloodstock must officially be the world’s most dangerous festival there are so many crutches and leg cast boots. Equilibrium emanate doom from the main stage, “German” doom as they are keen to point out.

The main stage at Bloodstock descends into chaos, red and black bodypaint chaos. This can mean only one thing, Turisas are due onstage and they’ve brought their usual army of fanatics to revel in their special brand of battle metal. Turisas break the bad news that this might be the end of their bodypaint and fur persona, we’ll have to wait and see. Next up on the main stage is Moonspell but there’s not much time for the Portuguese metallers as Anterior are about to start on the Sophie Lancaster Stage.

Anterior are one of the surprises of Bloodstock. Twin guitars attack in unison, sweeping arpeggio’s, plenty of chug and a healthy dose of circle pits from the talented and genuinely likeable Welshmen. But there’s no time to dwell on Anterior, have to dash over to the main stage for the heavyweights of metal Amon Amarth. The crowd is heaving at the main stage and boys are behemoths onstage. Big Huge and heavy.

Another highlight of the weekend are Satyricon. Singer Satyr strides the stage like a behemoth having the crowd eat out of his most evil of hands. Songs from new album “Age of Nero” sound absolutely monstrous with riffs that seem to transcend time and huge choruses that induce huge sing-alongs. I can hardly wait for them to visit our shores again (hopefully onboard a longboat) in December.

The best things come to those that wait and the grand finale at the Bloodstock main stage is of course Europe. They might not be the kings of the rock world that they once were but that does not seem to have diminished their enthusiasm for performance. Europe’s show is big, loud and brash, they’re charismatic, working the crowd as though this audience were the most important audience in the world and with detuned guitars they sound pretty heavy. But there is only one song the crowd wants to hear and after an hour of waiting the crowd start to get restless. Europe have the crowd on tenterhooks until, somewhat appropriately, the final song. All the excitement and anticipation explodes from the crowd in a glorious 5 minutes of rock.

Then as quickly as it began it is over and the lights begin to fade. We cling to the final moments of the festival as if we could stop time and exist in festival-land for eternity. But it’s back into reality with a bump and we are forced to leave all of this behind… even the little forky circle.